It's going to be soooo nice when going on vacation don't mean stopping all efforts at taking care of my fitness. Since I was leaving on a Friday morning....I skipped all workouts Monday-Thursday to tidy up loose ends....last minute items, packing, extra cleaning.... then of course since there is no cooking (and preparing) while on vacay, we ate comfort food for SEVEN (7) days straight....plus alcohol....alot of alcohol. Then when I return, I get sick and down for an additional week. I just wish..being fit was more apart of my everyday life... without thinking....natural state. I shouldn't even want that extra piece of fried chicken knowing the effect it will have on my body. There is a consequence for every action....and I should want to protect the work I've already invested in my body. I have to make a conscience effort at all time. There's no ifs, ands or buts about it. This will always be a part of me. My fitness goals whether I'm trying to lose or trying to maintain will always have to stay on the forefront of my mind. Always. And sometimes this is such a sad fact.
I'm experiencing "grey areas" in my life right now. Yes I am still separated and not divorced. Yes I still technically have a live-in boyfriend and a husband. And yes they both want to be a major part of my life. And unfortunately, I want to be a part of both of their lives but realize that can't happen. Initial sparks wear out and reality sets in..... just in my case sparks can go on a long time usually after sexual and emotional connections have gotten way too deep. Right now I'm taking the time to redefine love in my life. Love means something different to each person. I realize in talking to different friends on a day-to-day basis...that we all view relationships differently. Some women think that as long as he's a provider, they can put up with anything. To me money is not everything, what about the desire to be in your partner's presence? What about having that indescribable feeling when you get that hug at the end of the day? What about looking f...
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