YAY!!! I'm finally getting set up to have a hysterectomy....and just as I'm turning 40. Why would anyone want to put themselved thru that torture? Cause my body been tortoring me for years!!! I walk around damn near feeling dead and my doctor says 'well go see a oncologist, he'll give you some iron'... so I go and feel better for a minute...then that time of month come around...I lose alot of blood so I go to the ob/gyn because I'm in so much pain and she says 'well lets try this procedure and then go see your primary doc get your pressure under control' Primary doc says well here's you some HBP pills but now your blood low again...better go see the oncologist again....oncologist says wow because your iron is so low, your heart is doing double time...you should see the cardiologist to make sure your heart is fine. .... See I've been on a vicious cycle for years....feeling horrible...not living life to the fullest. So I need this surgery to live.... LITERALLY. Even simple tasks, like folding clothes is a major chore....my muscles are so weak... I am so excited to start to recover. I hate to miss 6 weeks of work but it's time to take care of me....before I miss more than work.
I'm experiencing "grey areas" in my life right now. Yes I am still separated and not divorced. Yes I still technically have a live-in boyfriend and a husband. And yes they both want to be a major part of my life. And unfortunately, I want to be a part of both of their lives but realize that can't happen. Initial sparks wear out and reality sets in..... just in my case sparks can go on a long time usually after sexual and emotional connections have gotten way too deep. Right now I'm taking the time to redefine love in my life. Love means something different to each person. I realize in talking to different friends on a day-to-day basis...that we all view relationships differently. Some women think that as long as he's a provider, they can put up with anything. To me money is not everything, what about the desire to be in your partner's presence? What about having that indescribable feeling when you get that hug at the end of the day? What about looking f...
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